Sunday Musings ...

Recently I moved. I didn’t move far … just across the street, but it gave me a different view from my bedroom window. It gave me a different perspective.

My view now is very similar to the one I had from my apartment window my sophomore year in college. Back then I was 19, and I loved the view from my front living room window.

Not only could I see into the laundry room to see if anyone was stealing my wet laundry, but I could see this.

I affectionately call it pride rock, because every time I look at it I envision this scene.

I spent a lot of time looking out of that window the year I lived in that apartment.

I looked out dreading to see the amount of snow that had fallen on that mountaintop during the winter.

I stared at that mountain as I caught up with friends on my brand new cordless phone!

I looked at that mountain in shock as I watched the horrors at Columbine High unfold on CNN.

But what I remember most about that view is that I stared at it everyday during my scripture study as I pondered on what my Heavenly Father was trying to teach me. I grew leaps and bounds spiritually and found peace and hope as I gazed at my mountain.

The other night I attended an outdoor dinner, where I had a glorious view of my mountain. As I sat there, surrounded by 18-year-old incoming college freshmen, I thought about my old 19-year-old self. I thought about how excited I was for life and how hopeful and positive I was for the future. Bad things happening in life never crossed my mind then.

I think about myself now as I look out my window at my view and ponder my life. I have been through rough times. More than my 19 year old self could have ever imagined. I am so different from when I first laid eyes on my mountain.

In the Broadway musical “Into The Woods”, Jack sings a song about giants in the sky after coming down from the beanstalk. While pondering his experience in the sky he sings,

“And you think of all of the things you've seen,

And you wish that you could live in between,

And you're back again,

Only different than before,

After the sky."

Those words came to me tonight as I looked out my new window and saw my view. I see it differently now. I have been through things. Some really hard things. And I wish, just as Jack did, that I could live in between. I wish that I could keep the depth and the wisdom that I have now after the experiences I have had, and yet still have a little of that excitement and naivete that I had at nineteen. It is something that I am working at getting back.

But everyday, as I look out my window, I am grateful for my view. For my enhanced perspective. I am grateful to be reminded of how far I have come, of how much I have learned and grown. And it only reminds me of how far I still have to go.